


I found you (I can't believe I get to know you)

by emilia_kaisa



Category: Figure Skating RPF, Ski Jumping RPF
Genre: Falling In Love, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Not Beta Read, Some Humor, Strangers to Lovers, Talking, angst is yuzuvier's fault but it's a side dish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:22:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23672245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilia_kaisa/pseuds/emilia_kaisa
Summary: Javi's a little drunk and maybe a little heartbroken, and then he meets someone who makes him feel better (and also settles in his life for good).
Relationships: Javier Fernández & Yuzuru Hanyu, Javier Fernández/Ryoyu Kobayashi
Comments: 16
Kudos: 18





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Uh hi hey hello! I've been struggling with writing lately and then this story came to me and I'm slowly climbing back, I think.   
> This is yet another fic for my beautiful ship that I came up with becasuse 1) I love them both to pieces 2) they cute as heck.  
> Title borrowed shamelessly from 'I found you' by James Bay.  
> I hope you enjoy!

Javi isn't feeling too good. 

His drink tastes bitter and he doesn't want it anymore, so he puts the cup down on the nearest table and reaches for a bottle of something that looks like an orange juice and thankfully isn't spiked with some cheap vodka. 

It's so loud, and people are having fun, and he knows he should too. The gala ended not so long ago and now he's here, in a team Japan house, that seems to be hosting half of the Olympic village. There is a lot of skaters, and a bunch of other athletes, but Javi scans the space with his eyes in search for one particular person, the one that makes his heart squeeze with pain and anxiety. 

Yuzuru is avoiding him and Javi hates it. 

He thought that his teammate got over that gloomy mood he fell into after Javi telling him about his retirement. They had fun on the gala practice, and the gala itself felt good, like they were close despite everything. But when Javi was was trying to ask him for a conversation somewhere in private, Yuzuru looked at him with unreadable eyes and said there was nothing to talk about. 

And that's why Javi is here, basically. Because there are things to talk about, there are six years of training and emotions and feelings Javi doesn't want to throw away. And he thought that now, without the shadow of medals and podiums looming over there anymore, they could just see what was possible to happen, because maybe it was the time to stop thinking about _what ifs_ and tacking them instead. 

Javi swallows hard, and takes a few more sips, and then almost chokes when he finally sees Yuzuru, talking with some girl Javi doesn't know. He looks relaxed and happy, and there is a painful tug in Javi's chest, fingers curling around the cup as he watches Yuzuru's face scrunch in a smile. 

And then their eyes meet and the smile on Yuzuru's lip dims as he excuses himself and makes his way to Javi. 

"You're here." Yuzuru says, with a little bit of questioning tone, and Javi smiles and decides to ignore the painful tightness of his throat. 

"I would really like to talk to you, Yuzu."

Yuzuru blinks, and shakes his head, a little flash of something like hurt running through his eyes before they turn to steel. 

"I know what you want to talk about. And I… I don't want to. My life, it's… is complicated enough. I don't need to complicate more, with… this." 

"But-"

"You're leaving, Javi." Yuzuru says harshly, his tone almost accusing "I don't-" he shakes his head again, looking Javi in the eyes before walking away. 

Javi looks after him for a few seconds before putting his cup away and making his way out of the crowded room, feeling his insides twisting and clenching and he really doesn't want to throw up in the middle the party.

He takes a stroll down the corridor, breathing through open mouth and telling himself that okay, it's fine. At least he has his answer now and he has been imagining things. Now, he can stop wondering. 

Suddenly all of strength seems to escape his body because he sways on his feet, suddenly feeling weak, and he slumps against the nearest door, back pressed against the cool surface and eyes closed. He can hear the pushing, pulsing in the entire building and echoing in his heart, he hears people laughing and yelling happily, and he feels so terribly out of place he would walk away if he had enough strength. 

He's a little bit tipsy, not enough for alcohol to cloud his judgment but just fine to make him feel a little over dramatic. A small part of him tells him that maybe he could try again, but Javi decides that he isn't that much into pain and humiliation, and it's not like he can't get over rejection. 

His brutally torn away from his little bubble when someone touches his shoulder and Javi's eyes flying open to see some guy standing real close and watching him with a kind smile. 

"Hello." the guy says "Sorry, but this is my door?"

He has heavy but understandable accent and young, nice face, and Javi feels like an idiot, so he shrugs, smiling apologetically. 

"Sorry, I'm going, I was just-" he stammers awkwardly, feeling like an idiot, and the stranger hums quietly, tilting his head a little and eyeing Javi with wonder. 

"You okay?" he asks and Javi gasps, surprised, and suddenly he's looking straight into the boy's eyes, dark and warm, and some switch turns off inside his brain. 

"You are too handsome to worry." the guy adds, eyes twinkling, and Javi laughs, because it's not what he has been expecting but it feels nice, and suddenly they both surge forward at the same time, and Javi doesn't think anymore. 

The guy's lips are chapped, he tastes like energy drink and mint chewing gum, and it's the best kiss Javi's had in ages. It's warm and careless and a little bit sloppy and Javi forgets about that dull feeling inside his chest and about the noise surrounding him, and just melts into the lean body pressed against him. 

He's not sure what's going on, to caught up in the warm dizziness of the moment, but then he registers a quiet buzz of a lock being opened and then he's being pushed inside the room and on the bed. It's a blur of tongues and hands, and Javi's loving every second of it until he feels cool hand caressing his jaw and that little gesture pulls him back to reality. 

"Oh, oh, wait." he gasps, pushing at the boy's shoulder and he immediately rolled off of Javi, eying him with careful curiosity. 

"You're okay?" he asks and Javi doesn't answer, too busy hiding his face in his hands and wondering what the hell is he doing. Now he truly starts feeling all the alcohol he has drunk and it mixes with the feeling of embarrassments, because what is he doing? What's the guy's name and fuck, is he even twenty?

"Hey." a warm hand pokes his shoulder and Javi takes a deep breath before uncovering his face and smiling weakly. 

"Sorry, I'm-" drunk? a little heartbroken? lost? 

All of the above. 

"Is okay." the guy smiles and, to Javi's utter surprise, he curls at this side carefully, with his head on Javi's shoulder "We can hug, if you want?" 

It's not too wise, probably, but Javi is tired and his head is spinning a little, eyelids weighing a ton, so he just closes his eyes and falls into the darkness. 

When Javi wakes up, he has no idea where he is. For a moment he can't say anything in the dim room, but he hears the music playing in the background, and he remembers. Party, Yuzuru's distant behavior, tequila and a boy with bright smile and chapped lips and-

"You're awake."

Javi gasps and raises his head only to drop back to the mattress, feeling a little wave of nausea. Still, he makes an effort to look to his right see his host sitting against the headboard with phone in his hands. 

"I will give you something to drink." the guy announces and hops off of the bed, and Javi sits up carefully, just in time for the boy to be back with a can of cola. Javi nods gratefully and takes a greedy sip, and he doesn't even have time to feel awkward, because he feels a hand taking his and shaking it in greeting. 

"I'm Ryoyu. It's nice to meet you."

"Hi." Javi croaks, his throat still a bit dry "I'm Javi. Um, it's nice to meet you too."

Ryoyu nods and for a moment they sit in silence, sipping their sodas, until Javi can't help himself anymore. 

"How old are you?"

Ryoyu snorts, and rolls his eyes, and then looks at Javi with a fond smile. 

"Twenty- two in November." he says and Javi breathes out with relief. 

"Less sad?" Ryoyu asks then and Javi winces a little, feeling kind of stupid. 

"I'm okay. Just, it's been… intense time. A lot happened."

Ryoyu hums, nodding slowly, and then his face brightens up with a smile. 

"I know what will help."

"Yeah?" Javi asks, trying not to show his doubt, because he's not sure if there is anything that could save him from feeling miserable at 2.03am.

"McDonald's." Ryoyu announces victoriously and Javi gapes, and then he can't help it- he laughs. 

"You know, it's a good idea. Just, uh, let me wash my face?" 

He splatters his face with water while Ryoyu brushes his teeth, and that doesn't stop the young Japanese from talking, and by the time they leave the room Javi learns that Ryoyu is a ski jumper, placed seventh in both single competitions in Pyeongchang and that he has an older brother who 'is hiding somewhere and talking to his future wife'. 

The party seems to be still going on, judging by laughter and music, and by the entrance door they bump into Shoma who's coming inside and yelps with surprise, blinking at Javi with sleepy eyes. 

"Uh, hi." Javi says awkwardly, because he feels that he should "Awesome gala program." 

"Thank you." Shoma says slowly, eyes darting to Ryoyu, and when they're walking away Javi can swear he feels Shoma's gaze on his back. 

"I don't know who is he." Ryoyu admits unabashedly when they walk away a bit "I don't know much skating but I promise to watch you."

"Okay."

He's surprised with how easy it feels, with that young guy who's been so surprising since the moment he announced Javi was handsome and kissed him, not caring that anyone could see. Yuz-

Javi flinches, and shakes his head firmly. He doesn't want to think about it, he doesn't need it. 

The restaurant is quite busy despite the hour, but they find a free table easily, Ryoyu comparing their orders and making a face when he sees that he has chosen mustard sauce for his fries. 

"This is wrong." he announces and Javi sticks his tongue at him before getting to eating. 

"I don't know anything about ski jumping." Javi admits after the first bite of his food and Ryoyu grins before launching into a story, not getting flustered when he had troubles with explaining something in English, just going around the problem until everything is understandable. 

It's probably one of the oddest nights of his life, going from sadness and disappointment through kissing a stranger and falling asleep in his bed, to eating fries and nuggets and listening about secrets of ski jumping. 

"First, I tried nordic combined. But then decided, better just jumping. All my siblings jump."

“So you have more than one brother?”

“Two. Junshiro is the oldest, then Tatsu- his name is Tatsunao but we say Tatsu- is five years younger than me. And also Yuka, our sister.”

“Woah, you’re a dedicated family!” Javi exclaimes, honestly impressed, and Ryoyu grins.

“We all just love to fly.” he says sincerely and Javi feels a surge of warmth filling his chest.

"That’s so awesome. It's the end of the season for you now or you have some competition to do?" 

"Whole March, jumping every weekend."

"That's intense!" 

The conversation flows easily and perfectly friendly, and Javi can't stop himself from glancing at Ryoyu's lips from time to time. It feels almost surreal, that they kissed, it all turning into some hazy, blurred memory. It was nice, though, and Javi kind of wonders how would it be to kiss Ryoyu again, maybe. Probably nice, but Javi decides not to try.

They finish eating and Ryoyu yawns discreetly, giving Javi a sheepish smile. 

"I will walk you back." Javi offers "I could use more fresh air before sleep." he adds and Ryoyu nods with a smile. 

They walk back, now mostly in comfortable silence, and they're next to the Japan house in no time, and Ryoyu stands close, looking at Javi with a cheeky smile. 

"So." he hums, tilting his head a little "Can I kiss you again?" 

Javi gasps, surprised, and Ryoyu clearly interprets his dumbfounded expression as a yes, because he chuckles and leans forward, pressing a soft, sweet kiss to Javi's lips. 

"Be happy, handsome man." he murmurs, placing one more kiss in the corner of Javi's mouth before stepping back. 

"Good luck for the rest of the season." Javi answers, feeling a bit weird but also oddly happy. 

Ryoyu waves at him one more time before going inside and Javi walks back to his team house slowly. 

There is still a little thorn digging in his side, but as Javi takes a deep breath, he knows that he's fine. He has won an Olympic medal, he has loving family and friends, and he just had the weirdest, but also pretty great encounter with a pretty cool guy. 

And maybe he has miscalculated with Yuzuru, but Javi decides he's not going to obsess over it. He hoped that maybe they could give each other a shot at something more, but maybe that's just another thing that isn't meant to be.


	2. Chapter 2

Back in Spain, Javi gets his life in perfect order. He's busy with media and planning his shows. He meets with his friends and goes for a few parties, spends long evenings on family dinners and chatting with Laura. He works through what happened with Yuzuru, and after a few weeks he is kind of glad with how ii worked out. He hated living in the constant doubt, wondering if they could or they could not. Now, knowing that that chapter is definitely over, he feels as if some weight was taken off of his shoulders.

Him and Ryoyu are in a constant contact, and Javi would never expect for this friendship to matter so much to him. Ryoyu found him online and reached out the day after the party, ad since then they’re in one long, constant conversation. Ryoyu is an interesting person, laid back and funny, and insists on video calling Javi every week to practice his English skills. It’s not awkward at all, and sometimes they joke about that night they met, and it’s so comfortable Javi sometimes feels as if they knew each other for so much longer.

* * *

Summer shows aren't as awkward Javi has been dreading.

Yuzuru acts perfectly fine, and maybe his eyes aren't sparkling as much as they used to in Javi's presence, but they still hug and lean into each other, because it's not really possible to throw all the years together away.

Still, some people notice a little strain, and Alex is the only one who decides to make a comment about it.

"Are you and Yuzu okay? He usually drapes himself over you during these things."

"We're good." Javi sighs, looking at the ceiling and marveling at how comfortable his bed is "Just, in Korea, we-"

"Yes?"

"Nevermind."

"No, dude, you can't do this!" Alex protests, throwing a pillow at him "Come on, tell me!"

"Well, I hoped we could have a serious conversation about us but he wasn't up for it." Javi spats out and Alex gasps loudly.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't-"

"It's okay, it's not like I'm crying at nights. Just hoped for some… honesty. And I guess I got it." Javi sighs. He doesn't want to dwell on that, he doesn't need it, so he decides to change the topic and share more positive story.

"But, so you know, I had a really charming encounter with one Japanese dude." he announces and Alex gasps again, even louder than before.

"By encounter you mean…" he wiggles his eyebrows and Javi snorts.

"No, I mean we made out and then went for McDonald's and talked."

"Kinky." Alex chuckles "Who is that? Are you in touch? Is he a good kisser?"

"Well, his name is Ryoyu, we text, and yes."

Alex lets out an excited squeal and Javi laughs, because it's nice, to laugh and gossip a bit.

"And are you going to see him again?"

"Actually, he's probably going to be on the next show." Javi admits sheepishly "But it's… we're friends, kind of? He's just really cool and fun, and did you know that ski jumping is extra interesting?"

"I'm sure it is." Alex chuckles and pats Javi's shoulder "Well, what can I say? I'm glad you're in a good mood."

"Me too." Javi chuckles "Honestly, me too."

"Were you in love with him?" Alex asks after a moment of silence, careful "With Yuzu?"

"I-" Javi hesitates, and sighs "I had feelings for him? And I know that if we tried, it could-” he winces, and Alex nods, smiling apologetically.

“Sorry, man, I shouldn’t have pressed. I’m just happy you’re okay.”

“I’m fine.” Javi smiles “Truly.”

"Javi? Do you have a moment?"

Javi spins around and sees Yuzuru, still in his costume, looking at Javi with a small, tired smile.

"Uh, yeah, sure."

Yuzuru nods and leads him back to the rink, the arena now empty, only some staff member doing something with a sound console on the other side of the ice. Javi doesn't even have a chance to ask what's going on because Yuzuru looks at him with determination and steps closer.

"I'm sorry." he says firmy, looking into Javi's eyes "I'm sorry, for being mean, in Korea."

"Oh." Javi gasps "I, uh, it's okay. Don't worry about it."

"No." Yuzuru shakes his head "I was- I should talk to you. Because you don't know that I-" he hesitates and Javi freezes, because he's not sure he wants to hear that, not now when everything is clear and his mind and heart are at peace.

"It's not that I don't- that I don't think about it." Yuzuru blurts out "I care about you, so much, and I would want to… see, maybe. Just, I have expectations, and people, and federation. And you’re leaving and I can't-" he shakes his head and Javi doesn't really want to hear more.

"It's okay. I get it." Javi smiles "It's all in the past now, anyway. Let's go get changed and grab something to eat, okay?"

Yuzuru looks distressed but nods silently, walking next to Javi in silence before drawing in a short, sharp breath.

"Shoma said he saw you with someone at party."

Something in the tone of his voice irritates Javi a little bit, but he doesn't show it, only shrugs dismissively.

"I made a friend." is all he says, and Yuzuru seems like he wants to press and ask for more, but in the end just nods stiffly, and Javi suppresses a sigh. He had made peace with it and he doesn’t need coming back to what ifs. Still, Yuzuru is his friend, someone he cares about deeply, no matter how much strain was between them. So they change into their regular clothes and Javi manages to convince Yuzuru to join everyone else for a group dinner.

He’s not mad at Yuzuru. Sure, he still wishes they talked earlier, but he understand why Yuzuru didn’t want to. If his feelings are similar to Javi’s, it’s not easy for him, and he probably still wonders from time to time, just like Javi. But Yuzuru has so much on his shoulders, another season ahead and million eyes on him, and Javi knows how much he cares about maintaining his image in front of the world.

* * *

  
  


Ryoyu stays true to his word and comes to see the next show, and he doesn’t come alone.

When Javi enters a cosy restaurant they agreed to meet in, he sees Ryoyu in a company of his older brother- Javi has seen him on some pictures- and a pretty young woman with a shy yet charming smile that turns out to be Junshiro’s fiancee and a big skating fan.

“It is very nice to meet you. Ryoyu told us a lot about you.” Junshiro says. He sounds a bit formal, but that’s what Javi was expecting from all the stories he heard from Ryoyu, so smiles back and eases into a conversation that it’s just a little bit awkward at the beginning, but the more they talk the more comfortable they get around each other.

Ichika drops most of the previous distance and after a moment she starts asking Javi polite yet very curious questions, which makes Junshiro loosen up too, and the night becomes absolutely lovely.

Ryoyu keeps on grinning at Javi from across the table and orders way too much food they’re able to eat, and it all flows perfectly, and Javi's surprised when he suddenly realizes it's kind of late and Junshiro and Ichika are excusing themselves and Ryoyu's grins even wider.

“She really loves skating and he really wanted to do something nice.” he explains and Javi smiles, picking up the playful tone.

“And proposed coming here because you are a really nice brother?”

“Most because I really want to see you.” Ryoyu says without missing a beat, and Javi gapes for a moment, and then chuckles, shaking his head.

“Always charming.”

“That’s me!”

They leave the restaurant and then walk into the nearest bar that turns out to be a place dedicated mostly for elderly man sipping their drinks by single tables. They must be quite an odd pair for that place, an European and a young Japanese wearing a fashionable shirt looking like covered with splashes of neon paint. A guy behind the counter throws them a bit of suspicious look but served them their whiskey on ice without a comment.

“I think we don’t fit in his standard.” Ryoyu whispers dramatically and Javi grins from behind his glass.

“A true tragedy.” he chuckles “So, you enjoyed the show?”

“It was nice. Really cool. But we don’t have pretty costumes like that.”

Despite being in a daily contact for some time now, they don’t run out from things to talk about. They exchange vacation plans and for some reason spend solid twenty minutes on discussing seals and sea lions. When they order a second round the bartender cracks them a little smile and Javi counts it as a total success.

“So when is the next competition?”

“In August, there is a competition in Japan, and then in Europe.”

“Maybe I should check my schedule and stop by?” Javi jokes, only a little, and Ryoyu smiles broadly, leaning just a little bit closer.

“You should. It’s not that fun in summer but still fun.” he says, eyes twinkling “Will be more fun with you.”

If they were in Spain or Canada, Javi would probably try his chance and lean in for a kiss. Not for some special, deep-rooted and serious reasons, but simply because he wants to. They understand each other so well, and the flirting gives Javi a pleasant buzz of warmth running through his veins. Judging by Ryoyu’s smile he thinks about something similar, and he raises his glass and clinks it against Javi’s.

“Deal?” he asks, something like a challenge shining in his eyes, and Javi isn’t someone to back off from that.

“Deal.”

They finish their drinks and Javi realizes that it's really late and he has to get up on some ungodly hour. He doesn't want to go yet, but he knows he has to be responsible.

"So-" he chuckles quietly when they stand on the pavement close to the entrance to the metro "We see each other soon, yes?"

"We have deal." Ryoyu nods "Goodnight, Javi."

"To you too." Javi nods, taking a few steps backwards before turning around and walking properly, and there is a little sting of longing waking somewhere deep inside him.

He turns around on impuls, and his heart skips a beat when he sees Ryoyu still standing in the same spot.

* * *

The last weekend of September finds Javi in a lovely Austrian town filled with sun and groups of ski jumpers walking around in groups, wearing sunglasses and matching clothes. Despite ski jumping being a winter sport, it’s still really enjoyable in the summer, and Javi has a lot of fun watching the competition. It’s kind of mesmerizing, and a little bit scary at first, to watch guys go down the run in and then fly in the air, and Javi makes a mental note to ask Ryoyu how the hell his knees are handling that.

Ryoyu isn’t too thrilled about his placement, but when he meets Javi in the afternoon his smile is as bright as always.

“Hey!” he laughs, basically throwing himself into Javi’s arms "I missed you."

"I missed you too." Javi admits honestly, surprised by a little tug in his heart he feels while saying these words.

Ryoyu gives him a blinding smile and then they choose to sit in a garden of one of the lovely restaurants the town is full of, ordering food and local beer and never stopping smiling.

"You're a little bit crazy, you know? I got scared standing down there and watching, I'd pee my pants if I was up on that hill."

"There are more scary things." Ryoyu claims and Javi raises his eyebrows in question.

"Like what?"

"Like, hmm- night butterflies!"

"You're scared of moths?"

"They're weird!" Ryoyu insists and Javi laughs, his stomach fluttering as he decides to be fully straightforward.

"I've been thinking about you, you know?" he says, running his finger along the edge of his glass, and he can swear Ryoyu blushes a little, for the first time seeming a bit shy, and Javi finds it absolutely adorable.

"I hoped." Ryoyu answers before slowly reaching out and loosely wrapping his fingers around Javi's wrist.

During the past months Javi had a chance to wonder about what is going on between him and Ryoyu. He's not going to lie to himself and pretend that he's not feeling a strong string of attraction between them, fueled by the easy friendship they have. Javi doesn't have hopes or expectations, and he's not entirely sure what he wants, exactly, but he isn't the one to shy away from trying, especially when he can tell the other side is interested too.

"So…" he hums, tilting his head a little "That should be a moment you tell me you were thinking about me too."

Ryoyu chuckles, and instead of saying anything he leans over the table and presses his lips against Javi's in a short, sweet kiss. Javi yelps quietly, not expecting that much affection in public, and Ryoyu grins at him sheepishly.

"English still isn't best, I think this is better."

"Your English is great."

"I learn, but don't tell reporters."

"Okay." Javi laughs, butterflies fluttering in his chest "And, hm, what are we doing now?" he asks, to test the waters, and Ryoyu tilts his head, eyes searching.

"There is not much time, now." he says with a bit of regret and Javi hums, thinking about his schedule and Japan Open that is only a few days away.

"But season starts in November, and I think, before I can visit maybe?"

"I'd love that." Javi says, and Ryoyu nods, smiling widely.

“Good.”

Nothing spectacular happens after that. They finish their meals and go for a long walk, and say goodbye in front of Javi’s hotel. It’s simple and easy and Javi is grateful for that. He’s not really used to things going like that, it’s always been about explosion of feelings and fire and complications. Now it feels… right, slow and step by step. And when he steps into his room, he finds himself missing Ryoyu already, his wide smile and bright eyes, his honesty, his fun personality. He doesn't dare to imagine anything more than what they have, with the distance and Ryoyu being Japanese- one thing is stealing kisses from time to time and going for something more is something entirely different.

Still, Javi goes to sleep with a smile on his face and warmth in his heart.

* * *

  
  


Ryoyu lands in Madrid on a cloudy day at the end of November, a bit tired but at the same time as energetic as always. He demands a shower, a walk and food, in that particular order, and Javi is more than happy to provide him that. Ryoyu seems to be fascinated with the city and architecture, and Javi couldn’t be more happy. They stop by the grocery store on their way back since Javi announced that he’s going to cook the dinner.

He decides in a paella, a classic he can do really well. Ryoyu offers to help, claiming that no one’s better in cutting vegetables, but Javi orders him to sit and relax. He's not even surprised that it feels perfectly normal, as if they had it on daily basis. They keep on chatting all the time, and Javi smiles and tries not to show that his heart is kind of racing. He feels warmth and excitement, and he's not anxious at all, so unlike another times when he had… feelings for someone.

"It's so good." Ryoyu says enthusiastically "You need to teach me."

"Okay, if we have time."

Ryoyu can stay only for four days before he has to fly for his first competition in Poland, and he's acting like it's whole eternity until then.

"You're very calm about it." Javi notices and Ryoyu shrugs, taking the last bite from his plate and a sip from his glass.

"I worked hard with new coach. No reason to stress before it happens."

"That's… pretty cool."

"I'm cool."

"Of course you are." Javi chuckled and Ryoyu looks at him for a long moment before standing up and walking around the table, making his way to Javi. He stands close, and takes Javi's hand, silently telling him to get up. Javi does so, curious what's in Ryoyu's mind, and then he meets his smile, and he gets it.

It's like their first kiss but better, because they're not strangers anymore, there's no alcohol and complicated emotions. Now it's just them, kissing in the rays of sunset falling through the window, and it feels safe and sure and kind of perfect.

They stay like that for a small eternity, and then Ryoyu pulls back, only a little, and takes Javi's hand.

In the dim light coming from the street Ryoyu's skin shines silver, and Javi can't stop looking. He also can't stop touching, fingertips stroking Ryoyu's neck, tracing his sharp collarbones and flat, smooth stomach. Ryoyu hums contentedly and tangles his hand in Javi's hair, bringing him down for a kiss, slow and wet, and Javi shudders, an echo of still fresh pleasure running through his body.

They keep on kissing for a while, basking in the warmth and intimacy, until Ryoyu sighs softly and pulls back, eyes shining as he looks at Javi with a wide smile.

"I have a question." he announces and Javi raises his eyebrows in wonder.

"I'm all ears."

Ryoyu moves, sitting in Javi's lap and wrapping his arms around him, smiling from up close.

"Do you want to be my boyfriend?"

Javi gapes, and Ryoyu smiles patiently, running his thumb along Javi's eyebrows, smoothing the little frown appearing there.

"But, are you sure? What about, what about people? Your federation?" Javi forces through his tight throat and Ryoyu frowns, sending him a puzzled look.

"What about them?"

"Will they… won't they give you trouble?"

"It's isn't their business." Ryoyu shrugs, and Javi can't believe how careless he is, it's not what he has been expecting at all.

"But-" he stammers and Ryoyu smiles, taking Javi's face in his hands.

"Okay, they probably won't be super happy. But they won't… ban me, or something. I'm one of the best they've got, and they need me, Javi." he explains, thumbs circling soothingly over Javi's cheekbones "And they know me, if they try something I will let the entire world know that they're homophobic asshats, and I don't think they want a PR tragedy."

Ryoyu is smiling, confident and calm, and Javi states at him with mouth agape, feeling something hot stirring in his gut and spreading to his lungs, making him gasp for breath.

"It's that easy?" he asks, his voice a little shaky, and Ryoyu's smile softens.

"It's easy to choose when you don't want to lose someone. And I don't want to lose you, Javi."

Javi's chest feels full, and he is stupidly close to crying, because he didn't dare to think about it, before. It took time for Miki to go public with their relationship, and Yuzuru didn't even consider giving it a chance. And Ryoyu just smiles at him and basically tells him that he will start a war on Twitter if someone will try to give them trouble, with all the confidence of someone who doesn't give a damn what people will say.

“Yes.” Javi says, his voice hoarse in that very unsexy way, sounding more like he was about to cry “Yes, I’d like to be your boyfriend.”

Ryoyu gives him a wide, sunny smile before pressing a few short kisses to Javi’s lips.

“I knew it.” he announces smugly before sliding off of Javi’s lap and reaching for his hand “Let’s shower and save water, okay?"

Javi lets Ryoyu drag him to the bathroom, and it feels like some out of body experience, and he breaks out of his daze only when he feels warm water falling on his head and running down his body.

"Processing?" Ryoyu asks, pressing a finger to Javi's forehead.

"Yeah." Javi breathes out, putting his hands on Ryoyu's waist and leaning forward to press their foreheads together.

"Don't worry." Ryoyu mutters, stroking Javi's cheek "We will be good."

And Javi knows it's true.

* * *

They're not hiding, but they decide to keep things private for now. Javi wants to focus on his show and Europeans, and Ryoyu is kicking the season off strongly and is determined to keep the streak going. Just like he told Javi, he's having fun pretending that his English is much worse than in reality, and when Javi tells him that he's being mean he says that he likes his translators much he doesn't want them to lose their job.

Javi tells his closest friends and family who demand to meet Ryoyu as soon as possible which results in a little awkward and Internet problems rigged video chat, but Javi's mom seems to be absolutely charmed and his dad decides to watch ski jumping every weekend now.

"You like them younger, huh?" Laura teases, bumping Javi's shoulder, and he scoffs, pretending to be wounded.

"You make me feel like a dinosaur."

"Sorry." she chuckles "But I like him. I can't wait to meet him in person."

"You'll love him. He's…"

"Yes?"

"He just makes everything so… easy. He knows how to make me laugh, and, just- he makes me happy."

"That's good." Laura nods, her smile soft "You deserve that."

  
  


His three weeks in Toronto are probably the most intense time of his life, and it passes in a heartbeat. But at the end of it he feels ready, and a little bit nostalgic, and he is truly happy when Yuzuru asks him to have a dinner together two days before his plane.

It seems like all the awkwardness is gone now, and Yuzuru's smile is friendly and honest as they sit with their cups of tea and waiting for their food.

"Nervous?" Yuzuru asks and Javi shrugs with a smile.

"More excited. Did all I could."

"It will be good. Jumps look okay."

"Well thank you, that's a compliment." Javi laughs and Yuzuru follows, and in that bright sound Javi sees that everything what could ever create a strain between them is gone. It's gone just like that little tug of a heart, a bit of wonder, but what stays is fondness and sympathy, and countless hours they spent together.

* * *

  
  


The hill in Planica might be the most intimidating object Javi has ever seen in his life. Ryoyu told him it was always a special event, last competition of the season, and Javi can feel it, standing in the middle of the buzzing crowd, waiting for the few last jumps. The weather is beautiful, sky blue and warm wind, beautiful mountains surrounding them.

Javi lets out a deep breath and crosses his fingers, and watches Ryoyu jump for his last victory of the season.

The Japanese anthem is a familiar melody, and Javi keeps on grinning like an idiot, feeling so much pride it's almost suffocating. He watches all the ceremonies and makes takes a few steps down the emptying stands, most of people leaving slowly and heading to celebrate. But Javi waits, like they agreed he would, and after a moment he sees him, in his favourite cap, with one of the trophies in his hand and a few reporters following him.

"Hi." he smiles, and Javi's heart skips a beat "I brought you something." Ryoyu says, handing Javi the Crystal Globe, heavy and glimmering in the bright sun.

"And what do you want in return?" Javi asks with a grin and Ryoyu chuckles, not sparing a glance toward all the fans looking at them curiously.

"Guess."

The collective gasp people let out when they kiss must be heard in the whole Slovenia, and neither of them doesn't give a damn.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!


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